Uncertainty about the future can be unsettling and overwhelming. To mitigate this mental discomfort, we each employ a unique bouquet of strategies. One such constructive approach is to set and implement realistic goals that cultivate behaviors, experiences, thoughts and feelings that feel most authentic and fulfilling to YOU, to take steps toward creating the future of your dreams!
Sometimes we think of action-outcome contingencies-
If I do ______, then I will experience/receive/accomplish ______.
When you pray for it, think about it, ask for it, and work for it, you’re taking action toward receiving it.
How about when you’re having difficulty picturing exactly what you want, because it may seem too far away from where you’re at right now? For example, say you want to plan a party, but are unsure exactly how it will come together- how everyone will interact, what kind of food to serve, who will show up, where it will take place, etc. Or, you want to make a job, or entire career change and feel stuck, scared, and uncertain. There’s so much unknown, and it’s only a thought you’ve just had, or a recurring one you’ve had for a while. Either way- it feels overwhelming. Perhaps you’re studying for finals and feel a lot of stress- unsure of how you’ll get everything done, successfully.
Whatever you’re going through is temporary.
Think of one such thing that you really want in your life, but don’t know how to attain it, or how it will work out.
Now, imagine how you want to FEEL when you’re accomplishing it. (close your eyes if that helps)
How do you want to feel while you’re hosting that party? (you can use all of your senses to make the feeling more realistic- what do you hear people telling you during the party? what do you see? smell?…)
How do you want the work to feel? What kinds of relationships do you want to have with your co-workers?… clients? What kind of work culture would nurture your personality and motivation? What do you want your work space to look like? and on and on…
A meeting, date, party, interview, future trip/vacation, public speech/presentation, a hard conversation- how do you want to FEEL before, during and after?
Identify and experience the feeling, and with faith, know that you’re always guided and supported- never alone. Let the feeling uplift you and ease your worry/fear/stress/anxiety…
Worrying is like praying for what you don’t want. Since I heard this sentence, I remind myself of it when I need it and it works like an alarm clock.
Last week, I was in Penn Station, going down the stairs to the track where I would board my train, and I thought about how great it would be to see someone on the train that I would be excited to connect with. After I sat down on the train, while on the phone, I looked to my right and saw one of my closest friends a couple of feet away from me. It’s amazing how often I’ve imagined a feeling and then experienced it. It is so exciting.
- Identify your desire
- Feel the feelings that you want to experience
- (Take consistent action toward your goal, with excitement and faith)
- Allow the desired experience to unfold
Cheers to cultivating remarkable feelings and experiences!
Here are some affirmations-